Sometimes the hard stuff neaks up on you… like misspelling “sneaks” (this might be a long one folks; sneaks just came out ‘snakes’ and it was only b/c I already misspelled sneaks…)
Let’s try this again: Sometimes the hard stuff sneaks up on you. I have friends who have had so much come out of left field recently. Breast cancer. Divorce. Death of their spouse at the beginning of their romantic retirement years. A nephew die after conquering cancer (so they thought) just months before. Children diagnosed with arthritis. Breast cancer – actually had 3 friends deal with it in the last 3 years. Spouse caught in an affair. Pregnancy of their fourth, unplanned child. Lack of pregnancy of their first or second child.
For us, the most recently “hard” thing that we have journeyed through is adoption. I had my tubes tied after giving birth to Elam via c-section and let me tell you: I did not doubt that decision for a minute. This body had had it with pregnancy and child birth. I have never understood what you ladies love about pregnancy. I never loved much. The good skin and hair was about it and it in no way made up for the rest… The 75 pounds of it was hard to make up for…
Well surprise, this tube-tying chick has three kids. Never would I have imagined we would have another child. Much less a boy. And the last two weeks have been hard. Tantrums. Kids fighting. Transition drama. Melt downs. Near vomiting during tantrum after fighting to get him to eat his meal. Dealing with his constant fear of being left out, of injustice somehow making him extremely angry and … well that’s enough.
My friends who just recently lost their baby keep asking questions and dealing with their loss. We recently spoke about God and what He knows and what He prepares us for.
My friends could never have seen it coming. In now way were they “prepared” for the challenge. But now that they are fighting through it and facing each day, I can say that in some ways, they were prepared.
My friends have build wonderful friendships in their neighborhood, in the running culture, business world and school realm of their kids. They have spent time building their spiritual foundation with church and our community group and their personal disciplines. They have learned to parent with affection and attachment and have a high value for family time.
Tomorrow I’ll be running a trail run for 26.2 miles. This is not something I have trained for. This is not in the 2016 fitness plan for Sandi Asker.
So why in the world would I try to do something I haven’t trained for?
My friend asked me. Grandma’s was zero fun. My body is in “marathon shape.” I’m 40. My other friend kept talking me into it. I think I like adventures. I won’t die.
And as I kept thinking about this race, I thought it fit after all. Things that we couldn’t have foreseen have been hard but we have done them together.
“In normal times, community blesses; in hard times, community saves.” Our pastor said this a few weeks ago and it has been true for us.
Our community is formed around our neighborhoods, our kids and and their schedules, our need for respite care and love of eating together. But the community that has saved each other this spring is much more. We have a Trainer leading us, keeping us ready for whatever is ahead. He can see more than we can and He knows when we need rest (every week He says) and He knows when we need to work hard. If we listen, He will keep us going on the race with perseverance.
So while we do normal life, we get to enjoy our friendships and our daily tasks. When the really tough uphills come, we do it together and we celebrate together. We will probably scrape our knees, hands and even fall face first. We might cry. But we trust we are not alone while we do it.
As I texted my girlfriend tonight about what we are wearing and packing, I was working on my nightly reading. This is what I read:
So just like I blogged before Grandma’s to “trust your training” I think this race I will trust my Trainer and enjoy the race with my friends.